The Rest of 2010: A Belated New Year's Post

2010 was an trying and chaotic year for our family. All the aspects of our lives that (we now recognize) had been on auto-pilot were suddenly flipped to manual control. For the entirety of our married life, we had lived in the same apartment, worked and studied at the same university, attended the same church, hung out with the same friends, and even driven the same truck. Suddenly we moved into a house, almost lost a job two weeks later, had a baby via c-section, got a last-minute post-doc at Yale, finished a dissertation, bought a new car, moved to Greenville, moved to Connecticut a month later, found a new church, made new friends, enrolled a son in preschool, and adjusted to being a single-income family of four, all while facing up to deep-rooted problems in our marriage and in our parenting that often continue to be a struggle. The product of all of that, and the only thing that enabled us to survive it, has been a continual reorientation of our lives so that the gospel is the center around which everything else revolves rather than the peripheral system of beliefs that (we now recognize) it had been before. As Darren likes to put it, we felt like God plucked us out of our nice, neat, routine little lives, plopped us all into a cold, bare room together and said, “You've got the gospel and each other. Make it work.”

And this is good. The changes we have seen in our marriage, in our relationship with Will and Lily, and in our relationships with others have reminded us that God is sovereign and He is for us, not against us. We have already seen that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28), and we are confident that the repercussions of all these changes will continue to multiply over time. For that reason, when I look back on 2010, what stands out most is God's faithfulness in the midst of chaos.

That said, I think it's important for me to also remember that 2010 was not all chaos. There were also many times of peace and joy and rest. My fear is that some of those times, which were sweet and precious, may get overshadowed in my memory by the more trying times unless I make a focused effort to reflect upon them and record them. So, with that preface, I give you “The Rest of 2010: A Chronology.” Please forgive the excessive exclamation points.

Feb 20: We moved to a new house! Even though, in retrospect, this seemed to kick off the season of chaos, at the time it was really quite exhilarating. While the house itself was beautiful with its amazing kitchen, front porch, back deck and huge yard, the most memorable part of this move was the overwhelming number of people that came to chip in. We felt so loved and encouraged by our friends and family that weekend.

Mar 3 – 7: Darren and I took a small “babymoon” in Blue Ridge, GA. Again, what stands out most is the kindness of friends—we had planned a touristy-type weekend in Atlanta, but had to cancel it because my job was on the chopping block at UGA. Some sweet friends from small group jumped right in and offered their family's cabin to us for several days, and we took a relaxing trip there instead. While there we saw the posting for the Yale post-doc that eventually led us to New Haven. The next Sunday, Darren and I did keep one of our Atlanta plans, a performance of King Lear at Shakespeare's Tavern, while his parents kept Will.

Mar 30: Lily was born! Need I say more? She's awesome.

Apr 2: Darren got the Yale post-doc! We got this news about an hour before checking out of the hospital to take Lily home. So, on the way to our house, we stopped at Target, bought a Sharpie and a white onesie on which Darren drew the Yale logo as a way of breaking the good news to his parents.

Apr 10: Will's 3rd Birthday Party! What a blast! His friends Jackson Morse, Gweny Musgrove, Melissa Coffey, Abby Winters, and Will Brannen joined us in running around outside, decorating t-shirts and visors, icing their own cupcakes and engaging in other generally messy activities.

May 8: Darren's Graduation! First was the ceremony at Stegeman Coliseum, followed by a barbecue with family at our house, then a night out to celebrate with friends at Trappeze. This day was a long time coming, for sure!

May 9: Lily's Baptism. Again, what made this special were friends and family. Kay Carlisle had made the most breath-taking baptismal gown for Lily, and it was wonderful to be able to baptize our second child at Redeemer Presbyterian Church even though we would be moving to Connecticut soon after.

May 21: 5 year anniversary! Friday night I came home from martial arts to a romantic candlelit home, complete with Van Gogh Dutch Chocolate martinis, Oreos (when dunked in a chocolate martini, they are truly a gourmet dessert), rose petals and a live performance of a new song Darren had written for us. As if that weren't enough, Saturday night, we went to Atlanta to Woodfire Grill for the single best dining experience of our lives. I will never forget those lemon mascarpone stoneground grits...

Jun 19: Karen & Bryan's Wedding! I have to admit, being Matron of Honor is slightly more complicated while nursing a 3 month old, but the entire weekend was wonderful start to finish. Personally, I got to enjoy all the fun of pedicures, mimosas and Ike & Jane doughnuts while getting our hair done, doing Karen's makeup, and pictures, pictures, pictures! It was delightful meeting more of Karen and Bryan's family and friends who live outside of Athens and especially getting to participate in the ceremony. Some other highlights: dancing with Darren throughout the entire reception and toasting with Patron Silver in dainty little teacups...a couple times. It was a phenomenal way to spend our last days in Athens.

Jul 3 – 4: The kids and I made the move to New Haven. Darren had gone up several days earlier and completely arranged our beautiful new apartment before our arrival. He even surprised me with new bedding in our room that we had been putting off purchasing for a long time. The kids were amazing travelers, and a little while after we arrived, we all walked two blocks to a tasty little pizza place for dinner. The next morning, we visited what would become our new church home, Christ Presbyterian Church. We ate lunch with our new pastor and were invited to watch fireworks the same night. We were so thankful for such a 'soft landing' once we got to our new home.

Sep 25-26: Darren planned a very special date night while his parents were visiting. First we toured the Yale Art Gallery, which was stunning to say the least. Next we picnicked in East Rock Park and looked out over the city of New Haven to watch the sunset. But the best part was that, instead of driving us home afterward, Darren passed our house and drove to a very hip hotel nearby called Hotel Sierra. We watched Georgia Football (and won!), tried out the jacuzzi, enjoyed delicious chocolate and wine, et cetera...The next morning we slept in (!), then pigged out at the awesome continental breakfast before heading back home to the kiddos.

Dec 25 - 29: Best Christmas Ever. It was so wonderful to have a long, relaxing trip down south for the holidays. First we stopped at my parents place for a few days and enjoyed lots of time and great meals with them. Next we hit Rock Hill to spend Christmas day there as we have every year since we started dating. We had the best time hanging out with Darren's siblings and parents. The food was amazing, and we even enjoyed some wine and chocolate while playing Cranium and watching the snow fall on Christmas night. The next day was a blast, too—snowball fights, snow angels, sledding, cider, all before noon! Then, as my Christmas gift from Darren, he and I took off for coffee and an afternoon of shopping for post-P90X clothes. The best part was spending the time with Darren and knowing that, unlike most husbands out there, he was actually enjoying watching me try on about a hundred different shirts, pants and skirts before walking out with only 10 things. As a matter of fact, this venture continued throughout the following week until we finally found suitable pants at Express the next Sunday. Finally, we got to visit with my grandparents, extended family and parents (again!) in Madison, NC. Will and his cousin Isabelle were attached at the hip for three days straight, and the cuteness was almost unbearable.

Dec 31: New Year's Eve with Darren. I'll admit, it was difficult to break a 10 year tradition of spending New Year's Eve and New Year's Day with the Odoms and Akridges. Still, after the rollercoaster of a year we had had, it was fitting to spend a quiet evening with Darren and enjoy the fact that we made it through this year, more than any other, together. To celebrate, we cooked a steak dinner together, and enjoyed it with wine by candlelight before watching a great game of football together. We rose above our previous disdain for (or fear of) New Year's Resolutions, and we made some solid ones together for 2011.

So, there it is folks. Like I said, I wrote this list mainly for my own memory's sake, but I hope you've enjoyed reading it, too. For those we don't see often, it's a glimpse of our lives that you may have missed last year. And for everyone, I hope it inspires you to take a moment to remember God's faithfulness and blessings to you over the past year as well.